Yes, this is going to be my birthday speech. Actually it's not really considered as a speech, since I just wanna write down my thoughts for turning 26 this year. Everything seems so fly past so fast and I'm already 26 years old. The past year (2014) have been pretty overwhelming but I felt like I did work hard to achieve some of the milestones that happened in 2014.
Somehow, I had a pretty tough time in the beginning of the year and that's when I realised and felt the unconditional love and support from my family and friends. Thereafter, I started to go back to learn my driving and finally gotten my licence just in 3 months. Officially graduated from my degree course with decent results. Gotten few job offers and interviews even before I send out my CV. Went for interview and got a job as a social media manager/community manager at a digital marketing company, with a pay that is higher than most of my school mates that I know of. And also, found someone who love me more than anything else. :)
Should I be thankful? I definitely am.
Should I feel blessed? Yes, no doubt.
2014 was an amazing and important year where I got the chance to learn from every single incident that happened to me and I'm very glad that it was really smooth sailing throughout. A lot of people have been telling me that I'm not young anymore. I should plan for my future and stuff. I know that I look like I didn't have any plans but actually I do. Time will tell, and it will tell.
Anyway, for those who didn't know, I just left my job recently to really focus on doing what I love - blogging.
It's not easy to come this far in this industry and I know I can go even further, so I do not want to give up on what I've built up for, for the past 10 years. I'll talk more about my work experience on another entry, but I really learnt a lot and I'm glad I went through it. Not only I gained knowledge but also it made me realise what I really want in life as well.
So how did I celebrate my birthday this year?
My friends and loved ones planned a surprise birthday party for me the last weekend and they actually planned it way back in December. I'm so grateful to have them as I did not expect anything this year at all. At this age, birthday to me is not as a big deal as compared to when I was younger, although I still do think it's an important day where you got to celebrate with your loved ones and treat yourself like a king/queen for the day. And I was so surprised and shocked by them. I'm truly touched.
Sometimes I ask myself what did I do to deserve all these wonderful friends that I have in my life. What did I do to deserve all the love from you guys (which people call you guys, readers/followers/fans etc) who supported me unconditionally for years and years. I know a lot of you guys stayed with me for so many years and there are also some, that left in between because they think that I've changed throughout the years. People have been telling me that they missed the "old typicalben", the one that writes everything and anything on this blog. They say I've changed, but I did not. I just grew up as time goes by.
I wanted to address this issue for the longest time, because I actually felt sad and affected when I saw all these comments saying that I've changed when I did not. The only thing is that I've grow up with time and I also want to keep some stuff to myself.
I know I've said this many times, but you guys really meant a lot to me and I'm very thankful for all the love and support. I know some of you might think, here he go again, all the same generic saying to the supporters. Yes, I also do feel this way when those celebrity always say that during their interview or speech when they received an award. But honestly, who am I today without you guys reading my blog from the start? Nobody. I won't be typicalben. I won't be earning money from my blog or social media platform. I won't be able to support myself for my daily expenses with these money and I might have to work part time when I'm still studying in university. I won't be able to pay for my school fees. I won't be able to appear on newspaper or news. I won't be able to do a lot of things which I'm doing now. And I cannot claim all the credit to myself, like... Oh because I was really hardworking previously blogging. Yes I was blogging but with you all reading and supporting, that's how I can come such a long way.
I always feel very happy whenever people tell me they got inspired by me in different stages of their life as they are able to relate to what I've been through and what I've experienced before. Until today, I'll still be very happy when people tell me that they love reading my blog, love my pictures or love me for who I am. I'm still very happy when people asked me for photos in the street and I've never rejected anyone for photos, no matter how horrible looking I was at that moment. Except once, when I was eating with my family. I got no choice but to reject this guy because we were all eating halfway through the dinner, and table manners is important and so I rejected him for the photo and until today, whenever I think of it, I still feel very guilty and bad to have rejected him. I'm worried that he might think that I'm arrogant or a diva because I rejected his request, but I'm not. I do feel bad even until now. I know that this kind of things might sound stupid to some other bloggers/youtubers, like they will tell me why would you care so much, but I actually do care a lot about the people who are supporting me all these while.
Although I feel that the bond between us is there and its pretty strong, this year I'm going to make it even stronger by interacting more often with you guys online and probably more interactions whenever there's events. I want to know more about you guys and know what you guys are going through as well, as much as what you guys know about me.
For my social media wise, I've also worked with a lot of brands and companies the past year and this year, I know it will be even better and more amazing! I was already feeling the positive and amazing vibe for 2015, even before it started! :D
January had been a pretty laid back month for me, as I just left my job (which was really really really hectic and tiring, so I was resting for quite a bit). But now, I'll be back on track and do what I got to do. This year is off for a good start, and I'm glad that it's continuing the greatness from last year but it will definitely be even better.
Thank you guys for growing up with me and for those who just got to know me, please hold on tight and join in our journey.
Talking about that, on the day of my birthday, I received a lot of wishes from you guys (thank you all so much!!) and there's this particular email which touches me a lot . She mentioned that she have been consecutively sending me birthday emails for the past 3 years already and so I went to search her name to see, and she really did. I did remember her emails but I didn't realise it's been 3 years already, so I went to read back all her past wishes again. I actually remember some of you guys based on all your profile picture on Twitter or Instagram, if you guys interacted with me frequently. I'm always happy to see all the familiar faces during events and appreciate you guys for taking the time and effort to come to events to support me. She's one of them and I remember her coming for Cleo Hair event the other time.
Another thing that I'm very happy about is that I can be myself to you guys and you guys still love me for that. Many of my friends told me, not to upload the picture of me with the balloon that says "Happy Birthday Princess" (which Ran bought it for me for my birthday) because they think that it will spoil my image. But most of you guys know how am I like already, my character and how I behave. I also sometimes call myself princess on my social media platforms, so why can't I post the picture then?
For all our #BenRanAway video, you all can also see how am I like in real life too.
So I don't need to change myself for the videos or pictures because I know that you guys will still accept me for who I am and what I do. Which is really important. We just need to learn to judge people less and to accept people more. Everyone is different in their own ways and they all have their own stories that we might never know. When I was younger, I really do tend to judge people but now, I try my best not to anymore. It's in our human nature to judge people we see, but after that we need to remind ourselves not to do that because they are human, just like you and me too.
Thank you all for allowing me to be myself and still love me in this cruel internet world.
I think I'm getting really emotional writing this because I don't really address all these things nowadays anymore. The only thing I can do now is to work hard and achieve all my dreams and goals. So you guys also have to work hard on yours too okay? You'll be able to achieve what you want, only if you believe in yourself. Trust me. I don't wanna sound like I'm preaching here or something but if you don't believe in yourself, nobody will. There are bound to be people who will doubt you and try their very best to put you down. But in your heart and mind, you need to be strong and know that you can do it and prove them wrong. To end this off, I just wanna say that I really love my family, my friends, my love, and all of you guys who supported me in anyway.
Thank you and I really had a wonderful birthday this year. :)